I'm heading to the US tomorrow, blogging and creating a mass of other content for one of our clients as they take their clients around the US looking at great places. (See last post for a better explanation - this is REALLY about Optus!)

One of my absolutely key pieces of kit is an iPhone 5 - which I had to get as, my one stand against total Apple domination is to use a Samsung Galaxy mobile - normally. However, you can't Vine with an Android - yet - so I've just had to temporarily be all Apple and travel with the iPhone 5.  

Well. I WOULD SERIOUSLY HATE TO BE A MIGRANT. OR A TECHNO BIMBO. OR JUST PLAIN DUMB. BECAUSE... 

You have no idea the runaround Optus gave me!  (And Australia Post.)

Ok here's the short list:

  1. Ordered phone. Delivered, But not to me. Note in tracking as delivered but it also said: 'hey, we had a hiccup!'. No shit.
  2. Rang them. Told them it was refused delivery because no one knew who I was. (We have an office of 6 people. They ALL work for me. I pay their salaries. IT. IS. NOT. POSSIBLE. THEY. DON'T KNOW. ME. Ergo: it was delivered to the WRONG address (and they wouldn't have known me, why would they???)  
  3. So, they say they have to send another one.  I tell them I'm going overseas and it has to be here by Monday. They say they can't guarantee. I say send to a store. They say wait. They come back and say it will be here by Friday.
  4. INTERLUDE: in the meantime, the automated NPS (Net Promoter Score) survey is SMSed to my phone. They ask about the service. I say it sucks. I say I'd never in my entire 52 lives, recommend them to anyone. They ask if it's been resolved. I say no. NO ONE CALLS ME. Why ask if you're not going to DO something.  OK, OK, I do know it's a robot. But I'm also an NPS associate as it happens so I know how that's supposed to work. Not like that. ANYWAY, back to the main story. (Still with me???)
  5. Australia Post delivers - well sort of. They don't come to the office but leave a card. Duh. It has the wrong tracking number on it. I try and ring the post office to find if back there yet. Have to ring central number. Wait on hold for 18 minutes. (Why can't I ring the ACTUAL post office? Speak to a person??? Oh, sorry, I don't live in a real world.) Give up. Walk there in person. 
  6. Get phone. Try and activate. Letter says you need information X to do it. I have X. Go to website. Website form asks for X and also Y. (No mention of Y previously.) Search all over documentation for Y. Cannot be found. I am honestly not stupid. Or illiterate. But I cannot work it out.  I am frothing at mouth.
  7. I call them. (It's now today. Monday.)  They tell me that even they can't activate it because they're having system issues. They say it will be done soon.
  8. 7 hours later it's not. I call them. They say will activate. Instead they cancel the number for my OTHER normal phone.   
  9. I ring them and tell them that the new number is working - kind of, but they've managed to divert all the calls from my OLD number to this new one. They tell me they can't fix over the phone and I need ANOTHER sim card. (Effectively the third.) He tells me to go to Optus and they will give it to me and activate it.
  10. I go to Broadway. The girl gives me a sim but jeez terribly sorry, I can't activate it, you'll need to call technical...I do it from the store. The guy finally activates phone. I tell him Samsung now not working. He tells me to get the second old sim, which has now been thrown into the bin. 
  11. The girl and I rummage through garbage. Find sim. Oh dear. BUT IT'S THE WRONG FUCKING SIZE INNIT??? Because an iPhone sim is smaller than a Samsung sim. Tech guy tells girl to give me another sim...and now, I can finally report, Marko, after a long line of Miguel, Vernon and sundry others, finally gets it sorted. I have two phones. They each work. They each have their own numbers. Halleluah. I just hope they work overseas where I'm going tomorrow, and that my travel data pass works too.....

 

Posted
AuthorAmanda Falconer